oh dear, i've missed a day

oh dear. how will i recover from this? i've missed a day of posting. i told you it would eventually lead to this. one day missed. then one more. then a week gone by. and before i know it, i will forget about the blog. nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

it must have been all that fresh air yesterday and the three hour long walk we had in the morning. i actually fell asleep last night while putting kaspar to bed ( i think i might have fallen asleep before he did, because i don't remember him sleeping...) and did not wake up until 1 am, when he was ready to eat. good thing, too, because after that we were awake pretty much every hour until 6 am. having a child is really an amazing experience, absolutely, except for the waking every hour part! ... during these types of mornings, believe me, there is nothing more blissful then having your mom walk into the room and say - "i'll hang out with him. go. sleep for a couple of hours." oh, what a blessing!!!

i'm posting a picture ( i really like this one!) i took yesterday at the jazz cafe, where we spent some time warming up and taking a break during our 3 hour long walk. jazz cafe has this amazing coffee. i love it. i swear, their plain cup of coffee tastes better then a cappuccino! and i really like cappuccino. especially the plain sorts. like the ones around the corner from my friend's place in montreal. mmm. cappuccino! have one on me, today!

i wish that this blog would allow me to post movies. today i took this amazing little film of kaspar (with my digital camera) , holding on to a mirror and talking to himself, kissing, licking and pointing at himself in the mirror. it was like he had just discovered the mirror (or himself), even though it had been there pretty much since his birth. very funny! wish you could have seen it. in fact he's been pulling a whole lot of tricks out of the bag lately. a few days ago he surprised me by grabbing on to my hands and pulling himself up on his feet. i almost dropped him off the sofa! i knew he could pull himself up to a seated position, but not on his feet. tonight, while we were having dinner with some friends, lari made him laugh out loud and giggle for a good 15 minutes. he was just deliriously happy! i had never seen him giggle and laugh for such a long time! he totally hit it off with laris. well, i'm sure i could think of a few dozen other things to write about, but just in case my fate is being awake every hour, once again, i better get to bed soon. tomorrow is sunday. another week gone by. another week closer to christmas. another week added to kaspar's life. he'll be 20 weeks old tomorrow. 20 weeks ago i gave birth to this little chap. wow. it seems so long ago. he's changed so much in these few weeks of his life. i promise to post some good pics of him tomorrow.

we've been saved

yes. she arrived. my mom is here, safe and sound. she arrived on time, on the 4pm flight from prague. we had some good take out tai for dinner. yummy. you see, living alone (or with a kid, who does not appreciate real food) my fridge has slowly become the place for condiments, not real food. it does not help, that bloor street in all it's glory is just around the corner! tonight, as i was waiting for my mom at terminal three, i realized that the only food items in the fridge (not counting kaspar's containers of brightly coloured mush) are 2 potatoes, a head of garlic, a bag of milk, a spoonful of sour cream and a whole load of vinegars, ketchups, sauces and other condiments. fried potatoes with garlic is just too latvian. i couldn't do it to her on her first night back!

oh. jau nak pie vienpadsmitiem. man mute platas bez nejegas (tikai zavas!) kaspars, bet ari mana mamma aizmiga jau isi pec deviniem. un es, ka jau parasti, trinos te pie kompisa. vienmer atrodas kaut kas darams, kaut kas lasams, kaut kas petams, kaut kas nevajadzigs, bet interesants.... sasoditais tikls! laika nosisana!

so vakaru pavadijam kavejoties riga, talsos, kuldiga.... parrunajot berzlapu ielas sagas un jaunumus, ka ari jau pagajusos notikumus. izstridejamies par to cik kaspars izaudzis, cik nav audzis, cik pienemies svara, cik izstiepies par sim dazam nedelam kops omcits bijis riga. man jau meginaja iestastit, ka esot loti izmainijies, bet ka gan tas var but? es tacu visu laiku esmu bijusi seit, klat - tas pats puika vien ir!

sodien ar visu lielo posanos uz omcisa ierasanos mes aizmirsam uztaisit bildites. kaspars man visu dienu palidzeja mazgat gridas un puteklus slaucit (vins man maisa, kamer es surijos pa maju - rit nofocesim tos jokus!) tadel sodien mums bilde sanakusi tada savada, melnbalta, uznemta ar manu fotoaparatu, kam iespejams uzstadit 'nakts kadrejumu' kas iznak melnbalta, bet ar tadu savadu gaismu. to nupat uzknipseju. kaspars aizmidzis, zem segas, cuc! es ari teiksu jums visiem arlabunakti! lidz ritam....

wednesday. a good friend once pointed out that wednesday is 'hump day'. it's the middle of the week, but at the end of the day, you're one day closer to the week-end. i suppose it only applies to those of us, who are working 5 days a week, but none the less... i think about it, almost every wednesday. so, if you're stuck at a day job - celebrate hump day!

today we managed to miss kaspar's late afternoon nap. who knows what planet we both were on? but, by the time i figured out that he was cranky for a good reason, it was too late. i figured he'll probably go to bed early... just after 7pm he got a great 20 minute baby massage and was ready to nurse. usually sleep follows, within 20 minutes or so. however, at 9:30 i found myself in an awkward position - a stiff neck and a baby, who would not let go. he was on a marathon! after 2h and 10 minutes he reluctantly resigned. phew! maybe he'll sleep thought the night....

tomorrow is december. december 1st. wow! where did november go? who hijacked november? that means christmas is in 24 days. i cannot believe it... tomorrow we get rescued. yes! my mom arrives tomorrow. bless her soul for coming!!! kaspar and i have been on our own for a week and a half, and even though we seem to be doing better and better as time goes by, i cannot hide the smile on my face knowing that i might be able to get some uninterrupted sleep for more then 2.5 hours at a time. bliss!

shoddy time, eh?

shoddy time, huh? my favorite past times these days truly are "a lot of making faces and blowing on small tummies to make a noise". i sure hope this does not qualify me for the shoddy time Olympics. and dressing up of pets is of no interest to me!(if you have no clue of what i'm referring to, please read comments on yesterday's blog!)

ugh. time flies. kaspar is out for the night (next three hours) , or so i hope. i'm about to hit the pillow, as well. we've had a busy day. after a hot bath, we both seem to be feeling a little light headed. i'm off to the bedroom with a harper’s in one hand and the new issue of weavings in the other. let's see which wins my attention!

a day in pajamas

i feel the pangs of guilt, tonight. i hate to admit it, but i've got to come clean. i will sleep better, if i do. here it is - i didn't take him outside all day! yes. it's absolutely, totally, completely awful. mean of me. selfish, in fact. that amazing and wonderful kid of mine was indoors all day. and it was +13 degrees out. he wouldn't even have needed his snowsuit. or the ever so disliked mittens. how could i? how dare i? i used the rain as an excuse. i used his need for sleep as an excuse. but they were only excuses for a much more selfish activity - working in the studio. i'm so sorry kaspar. i promise to take you out for two walks tomorrow (or one extra long walk) !

while i played bad mom (re: outdoor activities), we still ended up having a wicked day! after some wakeful hours last night, we both slept in until 9:30. kaspar woke me up giggling and we spent another hour in bed doing absolutely nothing. oddly enough, doing nothing with a baby, is really just that - doing nothing! have you ever thought about it? it's almost impossible to do 'nothing' with another adult. the rest of our day was spent productively working in our pajamas. since we never left the house, i simply failed to see any reason to get dressed. i truly enjoyed it! we got to try out kaspar's new toy - the authentic, vintage bouncy chair. he loved playing in that thing. thanks lidia! it seems that our kid knows a vintage, when he sees one! his two favorite toys to date are the bouncy chair and the wobbly chicken, also an authentic 1970's piece. so, while he contently played in his chair, i managed to get some work done in the studio. wow!

it's coming to 11pm. he's sleeping soundly. i must catch another hour at the bench, while i can. these sorts of days don't come by the dozen. i say a prayer of thanks and count my blessings!

tired

uh. hot coco. new daniel lanois cd. waiting for the phone to ring. ten pm. i'm tired. kaspar is sleeping. the dryer just stopped. i will retreat to the bedroom with a large pile of fresh smelling laundry in a basket. goodnight!